Dance Informance

And so I went. Dressed in my ballet uniform: pink tights, ballet shoes, black leotard, hair pulled all the way back.
We sat in the crowded theater as the run-through progressed. Here we are, at the culmination of our semester of hard work, and we miss the cue. It's just the run-through, I think, pushing the girl in front of me out. We're front row, going through the motions. I can't see the crowd, it's made up of the rest of the girls and a few scattered guys from the dance department, but as I look into it, I hear laughter. Oh man, I think, we're just bombing this. It's so bad.
From the corner, we hear our ballet teacher. "Make it work, guys! Just make it work!" and so we keep going. On and off the stage, running in and out, in succession...
The run through ends. We're told that the music level can't be adjusted, that we're going to have to hope that we hear it. Great. We sit, clustered in the basement of the theater and we talk. It's not bad, actually. We laugh a little. I'm being friendly, charming and sweet, all of the things I'm sure the teacher wishes I was.
And then it's time.
We're called. We're waiting in the wings. And it begins. We don't miss our cue. The audience is packed. The show sold out three hours before it began. No one made it to see me, and for that fact I am eternally grateful. They were all tied up with another simultaneous show.
We did it! We run off and then it's over. I go out into the cold night realizing that I'm almost done with ballet.

Great!

December

As soon as the break commenced, I found myself haunting the places that I had so often dwelled in my youth. We wound our way up the snow-covered roads to Red Rocks, where we trudged through darkness and snow to reach the silent amphitheater. The seats were smooth with white covering, no one had yet touched them, run over them or kicked footprints through them. We saw a buck, as big as a female moose, prodding his mate up the snowy hills. We saw two more deer by the side of the road, as we went up, and then two more in a field as we went down.
The city itself was another task to conquer. We drove through the old streets, finding houses that we liked or Christmas lights. We drove through Burger King, the usual run, only to find that the food was as delicious as ever.
I saw Emma, the yellow lab I've come to love so much. She wagged her tail at me, her fat little body shaking with excitement.
We went back to the airport, and I found myself crying for the loss of those moments and the memories that I carry with me still of our time together.
The flight home was miserable, as most of those early morning flights are. I slept, Mike's big hood covering my eyes. When I woke, we were circling Joliet, circling, circling until Midway could get a runway open for us in the snow.
I landed and Hunter came with my beloved Simon to pick me up. I let him drive back, content to sit and watch him. I hadn't realized how much I missed him. "I wasn't going to tell you this," he said, "but I missed you." He held my hand the whole way home and I was happy.
Emily and I ran errands last night. I loved returning to our little house. She had auditions for plays coming up, and so Hunter came to see me. We watched a movie, tired of it, and then turned on Monday Night Football to see the end of it. We curled up, watched some "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" and I fell asleep, exhausted from the early day.
I'm sick now. The first cold of the season had to strike me during the last week of school, of course. I had managed to maintain my health until now, when all of a sudden I have been struck down. My nose is running, my lungs are coughing, I'm sneezing, hot, cold, miserable.
Ah, but such is life. And everything is going to be alright.
Except for Logic, but we'll deal with that another day.

Surprise, Surprise

Just for Mom: Mike and I parasailing this summer in the Caribbean.


There was an event whispered about, invitations sent out early. Only have plans changed did the plan change, the secret out. I told her this morning, after her diversion had been ruined.
And so it goes on, the plans and the cleaning.
The guests will arrive later as night falls around the cold city.
So we will see....

Content.

I woke up this morning, in a house full of all the people that I really love and realized something: for the first time in a very long time, I am happy.

Perfectly happy.

Last night, on the phone with Lise, my birth mom, I realized that there is really nothing that I lack. Nothing. I have a great family, two moms that have served in different capacities throughout my life, I have a great best friend and roommate, I have a great boyfriend who adores me, I have a group of friends who are hilarious and strangely caring.
I have a supportive family who deals with everything that I am and everything that I'm not. I have grandparents, a woman who I consider a grandmother even though she's my cousins' and not mine; I have uncles and aunts who love me a little bit; I have a brother who is the most wonderful person on the planet.
I was on the phone with him last night, and he told me that he would pick me up from the airport for a price. I asked what the price was and he said, "A hug."
How can you not love Fruitypants?
I go to school most of the time, but not always, not today.
I have a beautiful city that I love, a little apartment nestled on its north side. I have a comfortable bed with a huge nest of blankets. I have a kitchen full of random odds and ends. I have a mildewy shower curtain, two pigeons who sit outside the bathroom window and coo when they hear us, windows that have never been washed, candles.
I have my computer that works half of the time.

He makes the pancakes while I'm checking email; I make coffee when I'm done. He puts chocolate chips in them, just the way we both like them. He flips them and makes sure that they aren't "fail-cakes." He hugs me as I stand next to him, wrapped warm in his big sweater, and I realize that these people have become my family.
I love them, I really do.
We play charades at night to pass the time. We watch movies. We talk and laugh.

Terrible Logic

Dear Mom,
This morning I went to get a pair of pants from my drawer and there they were, crumpled underneath a shirt: my ballet shoes.
Fail.
Love, Katie


The boys have been hard at work editing their newest features. Hunter's is the second installment of a fake movie trailer that we made in September (which has been their most popular youtube.com video). It was filmed on a better camera in more locations around Chicago; this time it's in color, and it's insanely intense. It looks legit. There's even a soundtrack to it with possible voice-overs to come. Ian's is a behind-the-scenes look at the making of the second trailer. They are both hilarious, although sadly, not appropriate for audiences your age.
Since I was killed off in the first trailer, the only picture you see of me is my dead body at the crime scene, and there is a picture of me and Emily in Colorado during one of the scenes with the detectives.
The behind-the-scenes film features me coloring Coupe's hair with Hunter's toothbrush, throwing a cucumber at the giant statue of Abraham Lincoln (and getting made fun of because I throw like a girl), and an interview with me discussing what it's like to be Hunter's girlfriend.
A good portion of the trailer was filmed in our apartment and our back stairs because they are so creepy and thus the perfect location for horror/comedy film making.
Ah, well, things are progressing. I'm throwing a surprise party for Emily on Friday night, so we'll see how that goes.
Last night was the first official snow of the year! It stuck a little bit to the ground and it was terrible and cold. But yay!
Also, in worse news, I failed my first test ever today. We're into the part of Logic class where it's all symbols and strange theorems and it's beyond my comprehension. So, I went in, scribbled on the paper for about twelve minutes, and then left. Way before anyone else in the class was done. Wow. I hate that feeling. It's scary. But seriously, when am I ever going to need to scribble theorems and know things like Modens Tollens?
Never. I should have taken college algebra instead.
I register tomorrow for new classes!

I still love Chicago, even if it is determined to make me cold and miserable all the time.

Fail Ballet. Fail. Fail. Fail.

Below, a special treat for you on a terrible ballet Monday. This is the load of crap that I turned in as 2 ballet journals. It totals six pages typed and doubled spaced. It's a rather, uh, suppressed look at my reaction to ballet.
Also, it would be helpful to remember that on the first day of class, I asked her to call me Katie. I signed the email that I sent this with as Katie Barry. Notice the response, printed below the story.
Ah, well I'm off to go buy new ballet shoes because I'm a space cadet and lost mine. Thank god they're only $25. Now I will have two pairs, hopefully.

(And trust me, the only reason ballet ever comes into my head is when I'm cursing it. It's not the terrible contagious disease she wishes it was.)

Ballet: By Katie Barry

She'd been skeptical at first.

The idea of a performance at the end of the semester hadn't thrilled her. What are we going to do? She wondered. We'll look like three-year-olds dancing at the big-girl dance show. She remember all too well the littlest of the girls, dressed in their little pink tutus and tights, led out in a line onto the stage, some pointing their feet, others looking around, trying to see through the spotlights into the audience to find their mothers, one usually facing the back wall, confused. She remembered waiting in the wings, anxious, stretching her toes inside her shoes and realizing that no matter what happened, at least she knew more than them. She had been older then, ten, maybe, dancing with a set of high school girls who had come to love her. She didn't understand their discussions, but she loved that they'd pick her up and swing her around before practice.

The first note of music snapped her out of her memories. She jumped a little, hesitating, and then thrust her legs out and began to run. She stopped on her mark, a straight line on the floor running vertical to bisect the mirror at the ground.

She'd told her friends. "Guys, we're doing some sort of performance in ballet at the end of the semester. You down to come?"

It hadn't gone over well. "Seriously? You want us to sit there and watch a bunch of girls dance?"

"Yeah, you should. Besides, you went to Emily's play."

"For the record, only one of us went."

"Think about it, please."

Laughter. She'd realized then that maybe she should stop hanging out with boys. Her roommate understood, would come and sit in the back and probably laugh at her afterward, but she'd still be there and be supportive. Ugh, I'm never going to one of their things ever again, she says to herself. But she knows that they'll be there. They'll all take the train up to Loyola on the Red Line from their house and they'll all clap and be polite. At the end of the show, they'll hug and tell her she was wonderful. They're actors, they do this all the time. They'll all talk about it on the train home, one of them will hate it, one of them will love it and life will go on.

She sighed as the boys kept on laughing about the idea of ballet.

She had been wiggling, fidgeting around, doing a fake dance to get into the zone, or something like it, and consequently, missed her cue to begin the preparation that her arms would require to actually begin the dance.

"Again!" The cry came from the corner.

She retreated, retracing her steps until she was edged up against the piano. The music sounded and she followed the girl in front of her out in front of the mirror.

This time, she looked as serene as possible. All wiggling was on the inside as she forced her body to stay still. She didn't miss the preparation this time, moving her arms from en bas into 2nd position, down to en bas again then through 1st to 2nd and down again.

First. One, two, she counted silently in her head. Shift. Second. Shift the weight, too. Three, four. Third. Where does my head go? Five, six. Fourth. Don't forget to move the arm. Seven, eight. Fifth. Arms. Really look like you have great arms. Fingers, don't forget the fingers. Thumb in. One, two. Arms into second, tendu, close first. Three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

Repeat, left side.

Look like you're smiling, sort of. Not too much, but a little. Look like you love it.

She laughs to herself then.

Balance. Slow down, she cautions herself. It's a full four counts. One, two, three, four. And then shift. She looks up. The rest of the group is mostly with her, minus perhaps a second or two. She counts out another four and another and then does her soutenu, closing fifth, and then begins again on the first count. Left, right, left, run run run.

And she goes to the wall, stopping before she runs out the door, although she won't lie, the thought has crossed her mind. It's like Logic class, where the big windows look out into the rest of the busy city. She spends three hours a week there, usually writing in her journal or doodling as the concepts of the theorems fail to gain entrance to her mind. On one of the windows there, it says, in strange dripping red pen, like blood written somewhere in a horror movie, "Window of Opportunity." And she's never understood why, but that fascinates her.

Should it be to get out of the class? She wondered. Jump! It seemed to be saying. (It is only the second floor. Changes of walking away unscathed are rather high.) Or was it a warning? Don't jump. This really isn't a window of opportunity. It's all fake. And that brings her to what it looks out on. Cudahy Science. Is college the fake window of opportunity, or did whoever write out the letters neglect to catch the drip marks? Either way. It's saved her from having to concentrate on Logic for at least fifteen minutes, maybe more, this semester, and that may indeed make it a Window of Opportunity.

Switching places so that she's in the back, she runs out again, this time, not so far. Tendu with the right foot. Slow yourself, she thinks. It's slower than you think. Left arm up, right arm out. Arms drop as you face the mirror/audience and open to 2nd to tendu again. Twice. Now left arm is the one that's up and we're still tendu-ing.

Now, sort of fourth position, plie, open the arms, finish in fifth with the left foot forward and run off. Go, go!

Another group breezes past her.

The windows were open. They were driving down Lake Shore Dr. He was too late to take the train to work, so she'd offered to drive him. Music was on; it was a rather chilly day, but the allure of the windows was too much for her. Nothing made the windows go up except bitter cold. Give it a week, she thought, and I won't be able to roll my windows down until April.

"Hey, didn't you say something about a dance thing?" he said, grabbing her non-driving hand.

"Yeah, why?"

"When is it?"

"December, sometime."

"Let me know a couple weeks in advance. I'd like to go."

She laughed at him.

"No seriously. You came down for my comedy show."

"Yeah, so?"

"I'll be there, I promise."

She smiled a little and squeezed his hand.

Now it'll really have to be good. I can't be the girlfriend who can't dance, she thought.

And so she stands, even when they're standing in the kitchen cooking, or watching a movie, or talking, or waiting for the train, shifting her feet through the positions. Sometimes the arms get thrown in, if they're not so much in public. Her friends have grown used to seeing it, it doesn't bother them so much anymore.

She hums the song absentmindedly, letting it carry her through homework or through the long walk to campus.

It's not all bad, she's realized. This dance thing won't be terrible. Scary, maybe, but not as scary as horror movies in the dark. Well, she laughs to herself, we'll have to wait and see about that. The only thing she can do is get all of her steps down, memorized, put into her bones, so that the only thing she'll have to worry about is who's in audience. And that shouldn't be too hard.

"That's all for today," she hears from the corner. The girls gather around and hear the closing remarks and then clap.

"Did you get my email," she asks the teacher.

"No, did you get mine?" the teacher responds.

"No, let's do this through gmail.com instead," she says laughing.

She heads back to the dressing room to throw on some sweats.

"I really hope we don't get graded too heavily on our pushups," she says to the girls there. "Because no matter how much I try, I always end up on my knees trying to push half of my body up and down."

"I hear you," another girl responds. "It is not something I can do well at all."

"It's helped though," says another girl. "My lacrosse coach makes us do five pushups every five minutes and I have no problem doing it at all."

She flexes and they all laugh a little bit. Her muscles are far from Arnold Schwarzenegger bulge status, but they're not bad for a college student. She keeps meaning to let this inspire a workout, something she hasn't done in years. Sometimes she'll walk down the lake, or walk somewhere after class, just letting her mind wander, and that counts as exercise, sort of. How about today? she thinks. I'll just walk until I'm halfway downtown.

She smiles and grabs her bag, heading out the door. Off to go home. Don't forget this stuff, she cautions herself. Work on the waltz step.





Katherine,

WONDERFUL!!! What a great description of your experiences in and outside of class..Ballet is truly getting to you-whether you like it or not. It's one of those things that sort of creeps up and you find yourself on the el platform going over exercises from class.

The great part of being your teacher is that I get to see your growth and evolution over time. I can honestly say that you have improved so much!!!! And it's only been a few short months. Keep up the great work and thank you so much for your creative journal entry. It was wonderful and a pleasure to read!! More, please!

Best,
Sarah




Hey, do you think I'll at least get a B?

Bite Mark

So we all know two things:
1. I bruise easily
and
2. I really hate ballet.

This story incorporates both of those things. Our mandatory ballet uniform is pink tights and a black leotard. Great. I love being clad in tight clothing when I'm being judged by college girls.
Second, the tights are mostly see-through.
The other night, we were all watching a movie and as a joke (don't ask) Hunter bit the back of my calf. Not even that hard. Well, as you can imagine, the result is a mouth shaped bruise that is huge. It's actually pretty cool as far as bruises go, but it looks terrible. He feels terrible. He keeps apologizing, etc, saying he shouldn't have bitten me so hard, but in reality, it was not a ferocious bite.
So I go to ballet yesterday, sans shoes, which I seem to have lost, and am sitting on the floor when the girl next to me says, "Oh wow, what happened to your leg?"
Without thinking, I respond very matter-of-fact-ly, "My boyfriend bit me."
Seeing the look of shock and horror on her face, I attempt to backtrack and realize that nothing can be said to fix the situation.
"I bruise easily," was all I could come up with. Followed by the failed attempt at a charming laugh.
Ah, ballet. Yesterday, we failed to get our waltz step down so she herds us into the corner of the classroom and tells us that we've pushed her too far; she can only be lenient for so long; we are the straw that has broken her back (I wish), and on and on, until: "All of your grades have been marked down."
Seriously? This woman deserves the scathingly terrible review she's going to get from me at the end of the semester.

Last night, Hunter and I were anxious, having watched a scary movie, we were determined to go out and see the world. And so we did, driving the usual path: Lake Shore Drive down to Roosevelt, Roosevelt to Michigan Ave, and Michigan back to Lake Shore. It's perfect. We were watching a commercial for some movie and I told him that I wanted to have a destiny, someone who would chase me around the world. "I'll chase you around the world," he said. "But what are you running from?"
"You," I said.
"What did I do?"
"We'll figure that out."
"I hope it's nothing bad."

Things are beautiful right now. My life, so often scattered, is falling back into place a little bit at a time. I don't need to stress about everything right now. I am, but I need to realize that taking a step back and letting things fall together may not be such a bad choice. Yes, Logic is the hardest class I've ever taken; yes, I don't understand it for a minute, but getting a C in it isn't going to kill me.
Everything will be alright.
Grad school can happen later.

Also, Rome next summer? Stay tuned.

Halloween Pictures, finally

Above: Me and Ben (I think his name was) and Emily
Below: Brad (director, dressed as the villain from Casino Royale) and I



Ian and Emily




Below: Emily and I
Above: Emily, Ben, me and Hunter


I got my camera back early this morning! And so here are the pictures from Halloween!

Reminisce

from left: Ian, Emily, Katie, Hunter

Alright, I'm in the mood for some pictures. These were all taken at some point between April and September of this year. I love these people. We've become the Crew, tight friends who don't quite match, but love each other anyway. Me, Emily, Hunter, Ian, Coupe and Kyle.
I love my roommate. Her opening night of her play, "The Good Woman of Sezchuan" was last night, so me, Hunter, her dad and a couple of other friends went to see it. I liked it; it was the best play that Loyola has done in awhile.
Two of my friends from Dairy Queen called me Thursday and asked to spend a couple of nights with me. They had decided to bring their girlfriends with them to spend the weekend in Chicago on a whim. It was lovely to see them. They met Ian and Hunter and Mr. Bates and did some sightseeing before leaving this morning to head back to Denver.
Today was a very lazy day. I fell asleep early last night and slept in today. Me and the boys made coffee, orange juice and cereal before going to wake up Kyle by throwing beef sticks at him. (Don't even ask, but since you're curious, I'll tell you: Hunter's grandparents bought him a huge box of food and it had this bag of terrible, dreadful, disgusting beef sticks in it. Coupe and I decided to hide them in Hunter's backpack, shoes, hat, jar of peanut butter, etc. and since then, it's been amusing to "beef stick" someone by throwing beef sticks at them.)
And then we all curled up and watched movies, went to the store, and then watched more movies. Good day.
I babysat for 9 hours yesterday. The little boys are adorable. They are so ornery though, but we still have fun. I made them macaroni and we played that we owned an ice cream store. They are fascinated by the thought of my car, so we had to go down and check on it to make sure it was still there. The baby is sweet. He has this little baby grin that he'll shoot you right before he throws up on you, so that at least mitigates the fact that you've been thrown up on. We went for a walk to try and find geese (we didn't) and to run through leaves (we did) which was nice, but a little chilly for my liking.


Enjoy these pictures as much as I do.


Trif, Ian and Emily the day the boys moved in.


me and Kyle


Hunter and I


Ian and I


me and Emily




Coupe at the bean



Coupe's birthday


Emily and I


Me, Ian, Emily and Coupe

Me, Emily, Ian and Coupe at the bean

Election Night.

I slipped out of class early and hopped a train headed south. Two stops later, I met up with Ian and Kyle and we proceeded to head all the way into the heart of the city. We got off the train and were immediately met by mass confusion and excitement. Police officers at every corner, people selling souvenirs and buttons on the street, massive groups of people heading toward the park.
We headed there as well, scoping out the situation. There was no way to get across the bridges as they were all blocked off by the police. We wandered through the park, and then realized that the only way to get in was going to be by standing in a line several blocks long and quickly growing. Hunter was across the street at our friend's apartment, so we went there and then realized that the line had nearly doubled.
There was no way we were going to get in. Maddie, Jeremy, Becky and Coupe were all in the middle of the line, blessed with tickets for the rally. We ended up walking through the crowd, mingling with the excited people and then we decided to hop a train headed north and go to my apartment to watch the election returns on tv.
And so we did.
When they announced that Obama had taken the election, we cheered. I was smiling so hard I thought my face was going to freeze. I felt a few tears drip down my cheeks and I realized that everything had worked out.
COLORADO WENT BLUE!!!!
I won the very first election that I voted in!
I hope you are all satisfied with the results. I am, absolutely.
McCain's concession speech was well done and respectful and Obama's speech was absolutely lovely.
We all fell asleep exhausted from the celebration and slept well knowing that our country has been handed into better care.

ELECTION DAY 2008!

I know you're not supposed to tell people who you voted for. I get that. But I am so excited to have voted for the first time in a presidential election that I can't contain the news. As if you weren't sure who I voted for:


I hope you voted, no matter who you voted for.
One student from Mullen, who I never actually spoke with but is a Facebook friend of mine, noticed that my status was GO OBAMA!! and then proceeded to comment that: Barack Hussein Obama is a terrorist. You should be ashamed of yourself.

I will say that I wasn't very happy with that at all. I responded politely, telling him that he shouldn't question the beliefs of someone he doesn't even know and that perhaps he might check his facts, please.
Ignorance is really annoying.
Some of my friends are for McCain. I appreciate that. I accept their decisions, so as long as they don't sit there and lecture me and spit incorrect facts at me. I don't sit there and tell them untruths about their choice.

Either way, there is a buzz around the city. Tonight, I'll be leaving class and heading downtown to a packed and very excited city. We'll see how it goes. I'll get to sit with my friends and watch as history is decided (hopefully in our favor).
Wish me luck! I will tell you that if McCain wins, there will be riots in the streets here. Even if Obama wins, there will be wild celebrations. I don't have my camera, but I might end up buying a disposable just to be able to record all of this. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity and I get to be here!

GO OBAMA!!

EDIT:
You know I love any excuse to skip class, so when Emily asked me to go vote with her, I immediately passed up Logic for the chance. And so we went to St. Ignatius, the church that the boys use as a landmark to get to our place without getting lost, calling it the Ghostbuster's building, and she voted. For the very first time. And we watched as they fed the ballot into the machine, and the number rolled over. Precinct 27, Ward 40, Chicago, Illinois had gotten its 233 vote.
And you know what 33 means....good news!

CNN was saying that Colorado was most likely going to go to Obama! Suck on that, Republicans! We haven't been a blue state since the 1996 election!

Post-Halloween update

I ended up going as Goldilocks after she got mauled by the three bears. That night, while Emily and I were doing our makeup and getting ready, the power went out in our apartment, so we ended up having to do all of the fake blood while sitting in the hall. It was excellent. I found that dress for $12 at a thrift store and couldn't help but buy the wig even if it is absolutely atrocious. The dress, however, will be making appearances at holiday parties, so expect to see more of it soon. It is awesome. It's an '80s prom dress complete with puffy sleeves and a ruffled bodice thing (the dress is a size too small for my frame) and then a huge skirt that ends at the knee in front and ends at my calves in the back. It's epic.
Ian and I went to the first party and hung out with some friends and then went back to pick up Emily to head to the Driver's Ed Mutiny wrap party with Hunter and Kyle. That was fun. We all had a great night, for the most part. I ended up meeting a bunch of people I didn't really know and talking to them for a long time. Hunter went dressed as the girl character from the movie, so he was wearing a teal A-shirt and tight girl jeans. Ian went as Shaun of the Dead (it's a movie, you've most likely never heard of it). Kyle was Two-Face. Emily was a fifties woman/Stepford wife.
The next morning, I had to drive downtown to appear for the third time in the movie. This time, they needed a picture of girls changing so that they can use it as blackmail for the driver's ed teacher. Don't ask. I got into my workout gear and went down and hung out downtown for a little bit in the men's locker room of Roosevelt University's gym. And don't worry, it's just my back. They've already seen my face in the movie, so it couldn't be shown again.
Then I went home and Hunter and I just spent a lazy Saturday watching football and bumming around the house. It was really nice. He made me dinner (macaroni and cheese, nice) and then we went back over to his house and watched Seinfeld.
Emily's show opens this week, so I'll be there for opening night.
I won't be able to get pictures of tomorrow night, which is super lame, because I don't have my camera at the moment. (I left it at one of the Halloween parties and should be getting it back sometime this week).

GO VOTE!!! Don't forget. I'll be in Grant Park tomorrow night as part of the giant overflow crowd expected to support Barack Obama. It should be a good time. Something tells me that ballet on Wednesday isn't going to be fun.

HALLOWEEN!!!!

Aunt Sally sent the most wonderful Halloween package full of plastic containers (which I never have enough of), cookies, candy, napkins and a super sweet little Halloween candle holder.
Mom sent a bike lock, some decorations, mints, and other stuff, which is always nice.

I did my friend Kyle's makeup today for his Halloween costume. He is going as Two-Face, a character from Batman who has had half of his face burnt off/destroyed. So we used Hunter's stage latex and created a textured face and then I threw some old sort of dried liquid foundation on, topped that with lipstick and then used Hunter's stage makeup to create a burned face. It looked so sweet. The final look was a little darker than the one in the picture, with more black and spots. He works at Borders and he texted me tonight and told me that I am awesome (obviously) and that people thought he was an actual burn victim
I wont be able to punctuate the rest of this entry as Emilys computer has something wrong with it and I just hit the wrong button but I am going as Goldilocks who got mauled by the three bears tonight
I have a black dress that i got for twelve dollars and a nasty blonde wig
excellent
pictures soon
better blog entry with punctuation soon

2nd post of the day: Politics

COLUMBUS, Ohio (CNN) — Sometimes you stumble on stories. Thursday was one of those times.

We were outside Veterans’ Memorial in Columbus reporting on early voting. I approached a man with an “ I just voted” sticker on his lapel to ask him whether he’d encountered any lines. The “lines weren’t bad” he said, with a broad smile. Lines were the last thing on Aaron Wheeler’s mind as he explained why he drove 600 miles back to his old hometown from Virginia, where he moved this month, to vote in what he called “one of the proudest days” of his life.

“My family has been Republican for three generations,” he said, but “I knew I had to change and vote Democrat in the first time almost ever.”

Wheeler said he was one of about 16 black Republican delegates at the 2004 GOP convention, and was proud to support George W. Bush.

This time, he said, he did not attend the Republican convention –and decided he would go one step further and vote for Democrat Barack Obama.

What’s influencing his vote? The economy was one factor, he said. But said he he made his decision “when I saw Barack Obama beaten down for no reason by negative things by Palin.”

Wheeler reminisced about marching with Martin Luther King as a boy, and referred to the slain civil rights leader when he told me he voted for Barack Obama… “not just because of his color….but in the words of Dr. King, the content of his character.”

“Tears come out of my eyes as I cast my ballot,” he said. “I voted for Barack Obama today.”



I'm filling out my ballot tonight!!!

Death

I went alone this morning, overcast and gray. I was feeling the hectic rush and wanted to steal away. There is only one place I know of that will make you feel alive and fill you with a sense of peace at the same time. I walked through the gates of St. Boniface to be met with the pleasant feeling of the sleeping. The noises of the city are somehow blocked out for me and I felt myself meandering slowly down the narrow asphalt path. One of them caught my eye, literally. I swear, had it not been stone, she would have blinked. I looked at her, and she me, for a minute until the call of the crows distracted me and I moved on.
Quiet.
Names carved in stone, faceless statues worn by years of harsh climate, the slow erosion that time brings, the eventual death of even our death-markers, gravestones that once stood proud crumbling in the gray light.
How can death be this simple, this quiet? I see a few other people scattered about, paying their respects to the dead, but other than that I am alone. I keep walking, and soon I find myself utterly alone and surrounded by nothing but bones buried, held safe by stone and chains.

The buildings rise out of the ground and make me wonder who inhabits them. Who planned them out and decided what they would become. I'm sure that some of you have started to think about your own demise. What will your stone look like? Flat in the ground? I will prefer a stunning statue, rising out of the ground, graceful, eerie, peaceful, energetic, immense. I want the viewers of that statue to wonder who I was and what possessed me to create such a piece. I want an angel, spread wings, perched ready for attack, or flight. I want a serene smile on her face and an open book clutched in her hand. I want tousled hair and a flowing toga. She will be barefoot, obviously. More details to come as my life fills up.
Some of the graves are stunning in their simplicity. The names become the focus, the forefront. Others chose a sarcophagus, rising out of the ground. Simple stone statues, the obvious religious figures, angels, Jesus, on and on. This is a Catholic cemetary.
It was beautiful. Green, covered with the orange leaves of fall, gray sky, gray stone, they rise to meet each other and blend together.

There are couples buried together, families. Even in death, they find peace at their side. The idea of this is a romantic notion to me. To want to spend so much time with someone that you are willing to lie for eternity with them. It's beautiful. Of course, the soul has long passed and there is nothing left but the fragments of your earthly vehicle, yet think about the lingering of yourself. To say that you wholly disappear is not a correct assumption. Your soul may take flight but your presence stays on. That's for me why the graveyard calms me, keeps me at peace. I am safe there. They are safe there. There is a mutual understanding between the residents, a sharing of space and of time.
Try it. Some morning. Go alone. Let them guide your thoughts as you wander, look at names, imagine faces. They were once just as much a person as you are now, with hopes and dreams and inside jokes. They loved and lost, just as you have and will. Be at peace, knowing that they are as well.



Be at peace and feel alive. That is the most you can do.

EDIT: two of the pictures, the one with the hands and the one with the snow are from Fairmount Cemetery in Denver, Colorado. The other two are from St. Boniface Catholic Cemetery in Chicago, Illinois.
I did not take any of the pictures, rather, I lifted them off of Google.com.

picture

I finally did laundry. It's strange to wear clean clothes, I'm not going to lie.

This picture is me and my friend Mike at the boys' house for one of our friend's birthday parties last week. Picture taken by Emily, Hunter's ex-girlfriend.

I'm going to see ballet by myself tonight, which may or may not be excellent and or terrible. The tickets were ridiculously expensive, $30 for a show at Columbia, and I'm hoping that I at the very least enjoy it. Then I have to write a review of it for ballet class and get that turned in.
I'll be taking the train downtown tonight, something I haven't done in a very long time. We'll see, though. I may actually end up just driving and leaving the car parked somewhere along the road. It's on South Michigan Ave, so parking on a Thursday night isn't going to be all that great, but at the same time, it's going to be cold, so I won't want to walk the five blocks that it is from the train.

Oh well.
Things are well, though. Last night was just a Katie and Emily night and we watched "Interview with a Vampire" and hung out. I was exhausted. It's finally catching up with me. I'm impressed that it's taken so long. Three months.
Tonight, there will be revelry; it is my last free Thursday night/Friday morning for the foreseeable future. I will have to wake up at 7 from now on to babysit by 8:30. Tonight, after watching the dance, there will be fun. And it won't stop until it's over, which will hopefully be never.
Ah, in my dreams.
Have a great Thursday, everyone.

Life is Rad.

Life is rad.
Tonight, we are having a sort of potluck dinner at our house, which has been in need of company for quite some time. We are making spaghetti, salad, garlic bread and smores. Then we are going to watch the Broncos beat the Patriots.
Last night I was informed by the boys that they like playing football with me and that I have a good arm.
But things are well. Halloween plans have been laid. I hope it will be a success. Fruitypants is going to be a priest, apparently.
I will post pictures of tonight, hopefully. It will be the first time in awhile that we've had people over and I'm excited.
I have to watch a movie for Cinema class, but I'm putting it off for the game.
Laundry, finally, will get done. It feels like it's been years since we've done it. No quarters = no clean laundry.
Aunt Jan, the sheep sheets are a hit.
Grandma Mary sent us a waffle maker, which is awesome.

The picture is of the sunset last night.

Both ballet and mock trial are FAIL. I'm done with both of them after this semester.

Poverty Presentation

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r10wx434IA4

Above is the link to a short movie that Hunter helped me make for my Women, Crime and Justice class. I did all of the filming and while he did the editing, I told him how I wanted it to be cut and we worked together on how to put all of it together.
It's interviews that I did with people in downtown Chicago about their perceptions of poverty and also interviews with homeless and the less fortunate.
It's about ten minutes long, but it's very informative and I like it.


Also, I got my absentee ballot and I am stoked to vote.



On another note,
I get to keep him! I'm excited. It's still sinking in.

"First Day Of My Life"


This is the first day of my life


I swear I was born right in the doorway


I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed


They're spreading blankets on the beach


Yours is the first face that I saw


I think I was blind before I met you


Now I don’t know where I am


I don’t know where I’ve been


But I know where I want to go


And so I thought I’d let you know


That these things take forever


I especially am slow


But I realize that I need you


And I wondered if I could come home


Remember the time you drove all night


Just to meet me in the morning


And I thought it was strange you said everything changed


You felt as if you'd just woke up


And you said “this is the first day of my life


I’m glad I didn’t die before I met you


But now I don’t care I could go anywhere with you


And I’d probably be happy”


So if you want to be with me


With these things there’s no telling


We just have to wait and see


But I’d rather be working for a paycheck


Than waiting to win the lottery


Besides maybe this time is different


I mean I really think you like me

-Bright Eyes

Well, here goes...

This is the condensed version of the conversation.
We'd been up editing my poverty video for four hours. He likes to edit, so it didn't bother him, but we'd seen the same half an hour of footage over and over. We'd been cutting, erasing, rearranging for what seemed like forever. We had just called it a night; it was 3:30am.
"Hey, I want to talk to you about something."
I was worried.
"Sure, what's up?" I said. My heart started beating a little faster.
"I really like you," he said.
Oh god, I thought, here it comes. He's going to tell me that he doesn't see me that way. My heart was pounding.
He paused.
"I'm not seeing anyone else," he said. "We've had a great few weeks. I was wondering, would you like to make it official?"
I said yes, but my heart didn't stop pounding for awhile after that and the smile still wasn't gone when I woke up this morning.


On a political note, look at this video about voting. It's satirizing the talks that parents always give their teenagers about drugs and drinking.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxvHkFLmqRk&eurl=http://www.wwtdd.com/


And look at this one too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vn55ZdmBPJ4&feature=user


Also, I made great strides in ballet today. We have to do journals every now and then, and I had like five minutes before I went to class so I just hurriedly typed out a page in stream of consciousness about what goes through my mind during a ballet routine. She LOVED it. She said it was creative and insightful.
All right!

Chicago Love Story

We said goodbye to the warmth last night, heading to the beach for one last night of swimsuit-clad freedom before the cold and ice move in to steal our paradise.
The four of us sat in the sand, shorts and sweatshirts, stretched out on towels, curled up on someone's feet. Flashlights appeared behind us, four police officers stood before us, circling slowly.
"Having a nice night?" they asked.
"Nice enough," I said.
We talked to them for about ten minutes, shooting the breeze. They had just wanted to come harass some college kids and, finding no beer on us, had found us amicable conversation. We talked about their nights, their jobs, our experiences with the police (I left a few instances out, obviously), why we loved the beach, etc. until they spotted some kids on the rocks nearby and decided to go sneak up on them.
Laughing, we bid them farewell.
The "gang-bangers" they had warned us about came up to us and we chatted for a second, exchanging pleasantries.
They went and stood by the water, the four of them, standing out against the gray-blue sky. Eventually, they found other excitement and left us to the lonely beach.
I went out into the water then. It was much colder than it had been even a week previous. I shivered, but there, under the dark sky, pooling clouds and almost full moon, I felt powerful, connected. The water around me was clear, not too deep, and little ripples had been made in the sand that makes up the bottom of the lake. I stood there, letting the waves hit my legs, and I just felt an utter sense of calm come around me and hold me.
Soon enough, my calm was broken by Ian, coming in to join me.
"We won, you know," he said to me.
We have had this on-going competition, me and the boys. It involves going swimming in the lake at ridiculous times of the year. We have not yet gone in October, and us getting our feet wet seems to have counted. I later ruined the surprise and got objections from Hunter, who had not touched the lake, preferring to sit on the shore with Emily.
Our little group stayed there, laughing and talking for two hours, until 2am hit us harder than we had anticipated.
We were approached by another group, boys from Loyola, who told us jokes and generally amused us with their strange tales. Not joking, all of us were laughing at them instead of with them, but it was a good time.
They left and we were alone and then we left, too.

Tonight in film class I watched a movie called "La Haine" or "Hate." It's French and tells the story of opposition between the police and three youths living in the projects. It's a beautiful story with a very sudden, shocking ending and it left me in love with the city I live in. "The world is yours," a billboard reads. One of the young men changes it to read: "The world is ours."
If the world was really mine I would drop out of Loyola and go to film school, but alas, that is not the case.
Instead, I have now. I have these experiences and this apartment and these friends. I won't remember the logic test I have on Thursday. I won't remember the fade of Dr. Pollock's voice that makes me unable to concentrate in social justice. I'll remember the beach, the games, the laughter.
Steve and I were talking today. It's his senior year. He's going to take the GRE in a couple of weeks. He has to go to grad school. One of his friends just told him today that they dropped that off of their life plan and have been experiencing utter bliss since. I told him it was all a precious balance, but that I'd take experience over extra-innings in education any day.
So today, remember something that filled you with an emotion. Any emotion, preferably a beautiful one. Remember feeling powerful, clear, invincible, loved, cherished, wild, or young.
I watched the train rumble by, headed north, as I left the campus today. The beautiful green haven meets the street, filled with cigarette butts and McDonald's cups. All of those things are heaven to me. I'm in love with this city, with its strange noises and even stranger people. I'm in love with the sounds at night, the darkness, the shadows. I'm in love with the lake, the lights, the magic.


Love life.

Cat

I met him in January of 2007 and spent four beautiful months with him. At night, he would come and cuddle me on the couch; when I couldn't sleep, I would lay my head on his stomach and just listen to him breathe. He played Monopoly with us, moving the hotels around with his paws and sitting in the box. He loved to eat tuna; whenever Emily and I made tuna melts, we would save him some tuna and he would eat it eagerly. He loved his catnip toys. He loved people, loved guitar hero, loved purring and jumping around, loved sneaking into Becky's room to hide under her bed.
He died Saturday night in Missouri. Ryan took him to the cat ER only to find out that he had a blockage that could only be fixed with thousands of dollars of surgery, which wasn't an option, so they decided to put him down because he was in so much pain.
I know you may not like cats, but I loved this guy.

High Speed Chase, just Cat to us, you will be missed.

Rant. Do not read if Republican.

http://whynotobama2008.blogspot.com/

Read this.

Ooh, I am so mad.


I understand why someone would want to be for life, but at the same time, why can't you have a right to choose?
I'm totally pro-choice, but if I ever got pregnant, I would never kill my unborn child. There we go. I am pro-family. I can't wait to have one. I'm excited and I hope that my life takes me in that direction. But at the same time, if a woman doesn't want the child to begin with, but is then forced to keep him or her, life isn't going to be a cakewalk for either of them. The foster homes are full of unwanted children, neglected children, children in need of someone to love. Pro-life families reject the ideas about birth control and have, oh, you know, 17 children and think that they are doing God's will. Selfish, much? How is making an already over-populated planet more populated God's will?
Palin talks about being pro-life and about how she lives it out by having a son with Down Syndrome. Down Syndrome is remarkably common; it's not like she has an alien child. I am pro-choice, but if I knew that I was going to give birth to a child with Down Syndrome, I would keep it. Seriously, her keeping that child had nothing to do with that. She was pregnant when she got married to her husband; did you know that? Did you know that 8 months after they got married they had their first child? You preach abstinence only education, but does that work? Does that work for anyone? No. Did it work for Sarah Palin? No. Did it work for her daughter? No. You sit there and praise Bristol for getting married and keeping the baby and "doing the right thing" but isn't that against everything you stand for?

Why are gay-rights so wrong? Are your gay friends any less able to raise a child? NO! Statistics prove that gay couples stay together longer than straight couples do. Look at my own family. I was raised in a heterosexual family and it was obviously a broken one. Perhaps had my parents been lesbians or gay, I would have come from a stable home environment. (not that I don't absolutely love my family, trust me, I wouldn't trade it for the world) Why does it matter to you that gay people shouldn't have children? Are they going to make them gay? Attack of the close-minded thinking. Gays don't hurt church attendance. It's not the gays' fault that the heterosexuals stopped going to church.
I think that's all a load of crap. I'm sorry. I met a boy who is openly gay and a beautiful person, yet he suffered gay bashing at the hands of people who think like you who agree with this do. He was beaten for something that he can't control. He had to have reconstructive surgery on his face and eventually had to move out of his town. Is he any less of a person? Why shouldn't he have a child? It's proven that the children of gay parents are no more likely to be homosexual.
Did you wake up one day and choose to be straight? No. Did he choose to be gay? No. Why would anyone choose to be hated by people who consider themselves to be "correct?"

You're wrong.
I bet you don't look Muslims in the eye either. And before you get mad, think a little harder about that question. I cut out an entire paragraph, because I got really passionate and would have offended most of my readers, but I want you to think about the way that you look at people.
Today, I went downtown with Hunter's video camera and interviewed homeless people. I had to bribe them to do it, but I learned a lot. I bought them all lunch and then me and my group (who helped pitch for lunch) sat down with them and interviewed them. What they had to say was not surprising, but it was touching. As soon as the video is edited, I'm going to put it up here. It's for a project, but they were so grateful to have someone to tell their story to. When I asked more affluently dressed people to talk about poverty with me, I was barely acknowledged. I got good response from the youth, but hardly any from anybody else. I was on Michigan Ave, in downtown Chicago, and it was like I didn't even exist to some people. I was laughed at by others.
Do you know who all of those people that I talked to are going to vote for? OBAMA.


Let's look at what else McCain will do. Let's look, because you know, we may not be able to get abortions anymore, but we're going to be in some trouble.

www.BarackObama.com

www.johnmccain.com

I went to a talk held by one of the laypeople who works with the Mary Knoll organization to discuss the upcoming election. They gave us a handout, written by Catholics. I'm going to type the entire thing here for you.
(What comes after every little section was obviously not on the handout.)
Category:

-Dignity Of Work
John McCain- voted for the Fair Minimum Wage Act of 2007. Voted against past bills to increase minimum wage. Opposes the Employee Free Choice Act which would provide workers with greater protection and freedom in organizing unions.

Barack Obama-Voted for the Fair Minimum Wage Act of 2007 and supports indexing future wage increases to inflation. Supports the Employee Free Choice Act, which would provide workers with greater protection and freedom in organizing unions.

Elect an official who doesn't want to raise minimum wage and doesn't want unions? Sounds like an awesome, excellent, abortion free plan to me! (fail, McCain.)

-Economy
McCain- Supports tax cuts for those making more than $250,000, and increasing exemptions for dependants. Would maintain cuts to capital gains tax and cut corporate tax from 35% to 25%.

Obama- Supports tax cuts for the middle class, seniors and the poor by closing corporate tax loopholes. Opposes extending tax cuts for the wealthy. Supports tax code changes to eliminate abusive shelters and streamline the tax system.

hmm...I don't know about you, but I sure as heck am not making more than $250,000 per year. I'm sure those people dig the tax cuts, but trust me, I would too.

-Environment

McCain- Co-authored the Climate Stewardship Act of 2007, which would reduce carbon emission levels to 60% below the 1990 level. In 2005, voted against funding renewable energy and stands requiring 10% of electrical energy to come from renewable sources by 2020. Supported increasing fuel economy to 35 MPG.

Obama- Co-sponsored Climate Stewardship Act of 2007 and supports a stiffer 80% cut in carbon emissions. Supports investing $150 billion over ten years in renewable energy. Co-authored Fuel Economy Reform Act of 2007, calling for a 40 MPG fuel standard. Supports requiring 25% of all energy to come from renewable sources by 2025.


Education

McCain- Supports school competition and vouchers as ways to improve quality of education and give parents a choice in schools. Supports a high tax deduction for Education Savings Accounts and tax-deferred Family Security Accounts for higher education.

Obama- Supports charter schools and increasing teacher pay. Supports increasing Head Start and Early Start funding to over more at-risk children. Supports a $4,000 annual tax credit for higher education.

School competition? Ask any teacher you know and hear what they have to say about that.

Foreign Policy

McCain- Supporting continuing the President's Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief and eradicating malaria in Africa. Encourages private philanthropy but has no position on the Millennium Development Goals. Supports the development of a missile defense system and supports reducing our nuclear stockpiles.

Obama- Supports funding the President's Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief and eradicating malaria in Africa. Supports meeting the US commitment to the Millennium Development Goals. Supports expanding diplomatic corps. Opposes the development of a missile defense system and supports reducing our nuclear stockpiles.

Millennium Development Goals. If you don't know what they are, go and research them. We are halfway through the allotted time, and we have made no significant impact in our progress on them. Ridiculous.

Health Care

McCain- believes cost containment is the best way to expand access to healthcare. Supports tax credits for individuals who purchase their own health insurance and helping states create insurance pools for uninsured or hard to insure individuals.

Obama- Supports reforms that would ensure quality coverage for all. supports tax credits for low- and middle-income households to expand access to health coverage and market reforms to guarantee insurability.


Immigration

McCain- Believes border security is the "first and foremost priority." Co-sponsored 2006 immigration bill providing current immigrants with a path to citizenship that includes learning English and paying fines, strengthening border control and creating guest-worker program that issues visas after proof that a job cannot be filled by a US citizen. Voted to build a fence along the Mexican border.

Obama-Supports a path to citizenship that includes learning English, paying fines and legal protections against worker abuse. Supports expanding and simplifying the immigration process to encourage family reunification and meet demand for jobs employers cannot fill. Voted to build a fence along the Mexican border.

Iraq War

McCain- voted for the war in Iraq and supported the 2007 troop surge. Stated that "I would much rather lose a campaign than lose a war."

Obama- Pledges to withdraw all combat brigades from Iraq within 16 months. Stated in Oct. 2002: "I don't oppose all wars. What I am opposed to is a dumb war. What I am opposed to is a rash war."

wow. In all of the debates, etc. McCain keeps saying that we can win the war. We can't win the war. There was no goal in this war. We are fighting a concept. Terrorism isn't tangible. There is no gain, we are only spreading terror and fear and pain.

Life

McCain- Supports state level abortion bans except for rape, incest and risk to mother's life. In 2005, voted against expanding health services and education to reduce abortions. Supports the death penalty.

Obama- Opposes a federal ban on abortion. In 2005, voted to expand health services and education to reduce unintended pregnancy. Supports guaranteed paid maternity leave. Supports the death penalty but helped pass a law requiring taped confessions in order to reduce wrongful convictions.

hm....so McCain is all about the family but could care less about maternity leave?

Poverty

McCain- Authored legislation that requires HUD to gives abandoned housing units to community organizations. Supports HOME plan to offer federally backed fixed-rate mortgages to sub-prime borrowers in danger of foreclosure.

Obama- Co-sponsored a bill to create a National Affordable Housing Trust Fund to build 1.5 million units over 10 years. Authored legislation to allow those facing foreclosure to refinance with a federal guarantee and reduce mortgage company fraud. Was lead sponsor of the Global Poverty Act, which sets an agenda to cut extreme poverty by half by 2015.

McCain has 12 houses. What more do I need to say?

Material produced by Catholics in Alliance for the Common Good. Catholics in Alliance for the Common Good is an independent, nonpartisan, lay Catholic organization that promotes awareness of Catholic social teaching. Catholics in Alliance for the Common Good is not affiliated with the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. (thank God).



Think before you vote. Don't just blindly follow the Catholic leaders. Please understand more than just the issue of gays and of abortion. There is so much more at stake here than the fight over genitals and who can do what with what they have. Gross, but so true. Just know that all of our futures depend on this election. I'm not even being melodramatic. Our economy is tanked, our world-wide reputation trashed, our politics laughed at, and worst of all, our infrastructure is in total chaos. College? Grad-school? Is that even going to be possible anymore?
Please. For everyone.

Do the right thing and don't vote right wing.



Ah, sorry about all of that. I know I'll catch more flies with honey than vinegar, but that's just not the way I fly.

Also, Fruit is the sweetest little brother ever. He's so very protective of me when it comes to boys and everything. He's so excited for me to come visit Greeley and hang out with him and I am sooo excited for him to come chill with me and all of my friends in Chicago. They love him and those who haven't met him can't wait to meet him and we need to make that happen. I appreciate that he's always there to look out for me, even when he's 1,000 miles away.
He's voting for Obama, by the way.

"Bomb, bomb, bomb; bomb, bomb, Iran." -John McCain

Our country is in turmoil. We sit, empty wallets, unemployed, watching two men in suits parade around, spitting sweet words that are meant to elicit trust in our fearful hearts. We watch them; we watch their moderator be unable to restrain them, their words spilling over, spreading out, falling on tired ears.
There are no concrete numbers, only empty promises, and what are we supposed to do? The old man sits there wrinkled, hunched, no neck to stick out and take a chance. He stands, leaning on his chair, looking aged and worn out. He attempts to connect with the people gathered there to watch him, calling them, "my friends," calling his opponent "that man." But these tactics are too pronounced; we see straight through them. There is nothing there that we want, nothing we want to buy. Nothing in his health care plan we'd subscribe to. He spends too much time discussing his opponent, too much time talking about our nation as a great machine, a growling beast. The war, that ever present shadow looming over our left shoulder, comes to the forefront and he tells us that we can leave that sandy place victories. What is victory in the face of death? What is victory when we have destroyed so much? There is no victory left for us there, no glory in that terrible place that we have re-created. We let their people die, we let our people die. Where is there honor in that situation? In a cause that we never revealed, never succeeded? Freedom? Democracy? What is that when there's nothing left but dusty tears and bones?
Regal and dark, he stands there, defending his positions and nobly answering questions with actual details instead of creative fantasies and whispered promises. There is no hand-shaking of the crowd after they've asked a question, no pandering to special interests, no shaded lies. Well, it's politics, but let's pretend just for a minute. He sits during questions, managing to look intelligent and eager, not smug and ancient. Not desperate for some sort of faded glory.
There is noting left of what the United States of America used to be. There is no happy optimism, there is no military prowess. We are a shell of the country that we used to be. We are mocked by people everywhere, we are joked about, our politics are regarded as desperate and crazy. We invade countries against the advice of the very coalitions, groups and organizations that we set up to protect against people very much like ourselves. When it is convenient, we listen to them, we lead them, we tell everyone else what to do, but when it serves our purpose we disagree, we rebel, we change our course of action.
What are we then, but evil doers in the world? We began with the aim of protection and the power has been abused, misused, taken and destroyed. We have destroyed ourselves, we have let this happen. Our leaders have failed us and we must not let that happen again.
Stand up and say something, use your voice, your abilities. Fight for change, if you can, if you will. Because there is nothing left of our country, no hope unless we strive to lift ourselves out of this terrible hole. We are lost without your vote. Vote. Vote. Vote.
There is nothing more imperative at this moment. And let's hope you vote the right way, obviously. This is one test that has a correct answer: Barack Obama.

and save your money, turn off your lights, spend nothing more than you make and pray to whatever god you believe in for a ray of light in this strange dark hour. Pray you still have your job, your retirement and most importantly your peace of mind.

Peace and love, everyone.

Weekend Update

Sunday afternoon brought football with the boys after a nice rain. We were slipping and sliding, most of us losing our shoes eventually to play in bare feet. We'd fall, dirt stains and grass mingling on our jeans. I face-planted at one point, sliding along the ground on my cheek, which was not so much fun and left a lame and sort of burly red mark under my eye. Emily sat on the sideline, whittling a stick into some of sort of weapon.
After the sun went down, we decided we were freezing and sore and we made the trek back home to get warm and hang out.

We made the Costco run this weekend, getting necessities. However, no luck on the bike, so the search continues.

alright, register to vote! the deadline is coming soon.

You have found her, now go and get her.

Life is beautiful and strange.
Last night, we saw "Intimate Apparel," a play about a turn of the century African-American seamstress struggling to find love in the New York. Eventually, she marries and is totally used by her husband for her money. It's a play with strong female characters and an interesting man. Loyola had to hire an actor to play the man because we don't have any strong black actors who could have played the part.
Neither one of us wanted to go out. We were tired, anti-social and would rather have curled up and just gone to sleep with a movie in.
But no, life doesn't work like that. These are the dying days of our youth. There's no time for sleeping, we can do that when we are dead.
We dressed, painted our faces, did our hair and make the trek down to the first party, held by the boys that we met last week. Our mutual friends were there, but left shortly after our arrival. We played games and chatted with all of the people there. Emily and I have both decided that we don't really like either of the boys in a romantic way. One of them is sort of sleazy (totally my bad luck) and the other is sort of boring (Emily's luck entirely). Their roommates, however, are hilarious and we all stayed up talking and laughing and it was actually a really fun time.
We ended up taking some girl home whose roommate had totally ditched her and then I called Hunter and saved him from the antics of Ian and Kyle.
All in all, good night, not too much fun, and I feel bad because we missed Matt's birthday party. I can't be everywhere, though.

Tell someone you love them today. The world doesn't get enough of that. Go kiss someone (if you can) or go snuggle someone and just tell them that you're glad they're there. Trust me. It makes a world of difference.

"I want to look in your eyes and see your wonderful laughter." -Ming&Ping, "Midnight on the Bridge."

Hey jude, dont make it bad.
Take a sad song and make it better.
Remember to let her into your heart,
Then you can start to make it better.

Hey jude, dont be afraid.
You were made to go out and get her.
The minute you let her under your skin,
Then you begin to make it better.

And anytime you feel the pain, hey jude, refrain,
Dont carry the world upon your shoulders.
For well you know that its a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder.

Hey jude, dont let me down.
You have found her, now go and get her.
Remember to let her into your heart,
Then you can start to make it better.

So let it out and let it in, hey jude, begin,
Youre waiting for someone to perform with.
And dont you know that its just you, hey jude, youll do,
The movement you need is on your shoulder.

Hey jude, dont make it bad.
Take a sad song and make it better.
Remember to let her under your skin,
Then youll begin to make it
Better better better better better better, oh.

Na na na na na ,na na na, hey jude...

Five-Day Weekend!

On Wednesday night, I went over to the boys' house after mock trial practice to play charades with them. We've been playing charades most nights and we find it to be a very interesting game, no matter what the conditions.
Well, as we are sitting there, one of the boys who lives upstairs came in through the back door to tell us to be a little bit quieter. (Ironic, considering it was a game of Charades, no?) Instead of simply turning around and leaving after he said it, he stayed with us and kept on talking to us. I turned to say something, and he told me that I couldn't talk because I was a woman.
Wow. I was shocked. I told him that it wasn't a fair thing to say and he continued, saying things about women in general, and me for the duration of the time that he was there. We were all just sitting there, shocked.
I didn't say anything. I catch a lot of crap from the boys about being a girl, but this was something entirely different. This was an all out attack and this wasn't even funny, which most of the things the boys say are.
I got up and left the room and Ian and Kyle followed me.
Coupe and Hunter finally finished talking to him, and when they came back inside there was a discussion about how rude that had been.
I was still bothered by it, though, so I decided to put on my shoes and leave. On the way down the stairs, I started crying, and Ian came outside with me and talked to me and in the end, I went back inside, we locked the back door, and the boys all apologized for not saying something while he had been in the house and told me that they wouldn't stand for it ever again and that I deserved more than that.
Well, better late than never.
I have never been treated like that as a woman. Never. It's terrible. I thought that that kind of sexist crap wasn't tolerated or taught anymore.
Both Emily and I consider ourselves "one of the boys," and the boys consider us to be that as well. Granted, we are infinitely more attractive, but that's obvious and often overlooked.
And last night, Hunter told me he was sorry again and that he never wanted me to feel like that again, especially not in their apartment (which is like my second home).

Thursday night tradition continued last night, although with a smaller crowd, which was utterly enjoyable. We always watch It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and then since none of us have class on Fridays, we just hang out and play all night. Last night, I got over there as soon as I was done with class and hung out with Coupe, Ian and Hunter and waited for Kyle to get home, Jeremy to come over and Emily to get done with rehearsal.
The debate started at eight, and by eight thirty five we had all completely lost interest. We are all very politically charged people, all of us liberals, yet we couldn't stand to watch Sarah Palin's mouth move and her eyebrows go up and down.
So we commenced playing games and hanging out. At one point, I got into a wrestling match with Coupe, which was a bad idea, because I lost terribly (although I did put up a good fight) and now my elbows are covered in bruises.
We stayed up most of the night (as usual) and danced and played another awesome game of charades and made food and then went to sleep in our usual spots, comfortable and happy.
Yeah, great way to kick off the weekend.
Today, however, was incredibly fail. We were supposed to go to Costco, but after I took Hunter to work I came home and Emily and I ended up sleeping until a half hour ago. So, you know, it's six o'clock and we have to get ready and go be the social creatures that Friday night seems to turn us into.
Tonight we are going to see the play "Intimate Apparel," after which we will progress downtown to a party hosted by two brothers that we met last weekend at another party. And then, there is another party tonight celebrating our friend's 21st. So who knows what the night will bring, but it certainly will not be wild. I hope.
Tomorrow, I am driving out somewhere because the movie that Hunter is in needs a female to pose with a police officer. So that's what I'm doing. I can now add movie extra to my resume. Sweet.

Yeah, so. Happy Weekend!

Busy, Busy

Babysitting.
Mock Trial.
Class.
It's never ending.
I'm exhausted.

I got two parking tickets in 12 hours, after not having gotten one since I moved here two months ago! (Can you believe that it's been two months already? Wow.)

It's cold here. The heat in our apartment is not on. It probably won't be for awhile. It's radiators, so if anyone is familiar with radiators, let me know how they will work. Doesn't the building have to turn them on? and then we open knobs or something?
Who knows, but I'm actually wearing socks.

I'm going to go look at bikes this weekend. It'll be nice to have one again, especially because it's getting colder and walking anywhere is lame.

blah blah blah, update you later.
love.

Weekend and Pictures

That baby is my old roommate's one year old daughter, Emma. She's beautiful. The girl in the pictures who isn't Emily is Sarah.
From the left in the dinner scene, we have Ian, his friend Jeremy, Hunter making a terrible face and then Emily.
The party was excellent. It was so nice to see Sarah again and her life is coming together beautifully. She's still in school, happy and her daughter is growing up to be a lovely young lady. She's walking now and talking a little bit.
I bought a crock pot for $10 off of the other Emily, so hopefully that will be used often.

Have a great Sunday!