It hit me like a ton of bricks. Life is funny; there's always a reason for everything. Of course, the conference in Boston reaffirmed everything I couldn't quite figure out. Curiosity about the professional world, the realization that a degree in Communications won't do much for me and a romance novel that can't seem to get past twenty pages because I'm constantly distracted have led me to a simple answer:
Business school.
Terrified about my future, I have realized that there's nothing I'd like more than to be in school longer. But legitimate school. Purposeful and focused. Who cares about gender studies?
I'm dropping my third minor unless I can figure something out, but other than that, all should be well. I've emailed the department, hoping for a resolution of some sort.
The possibility of getting a dual MBA/MS in Marketing for under $25,000 exists. (How sweet would that be?)
I've been afraid because I thought it was all math. It can't be all math. And I can emphasize philanthropic marketing so I'll still be able to do some of the social work aspects (sort of, but not really) in my future life.
More details to come as I figure out what the hell I'm doing. (The application deadline is June 1. Let's get this one in way before, so I'll know.)
Ha, I bet I'm the only person preparing to take the GMAT at the end of March/early April.
This time I'm not going to tell anybody, except you dear readers, for fear of being rejected again. (I really don't get rejected often. It hurts. I'm not a fan.) But CU Denver, where I've decided to apply, shouldn't reject me unless I screw up on the GMAT, which I won't. Hopefully. I've never gotten a bad grade on a standardized test in my life.
*
My Tuesdays and Thursdays are my busiest days but they're also my favorite days of the week. I have a break between 9:45 and 11:30, so I go to the Information Commons (the library at Loyola) and sit in one of the leather chairs overlooking the lake. You might also remember this as the place where the body was discovered back in November.
I came to Loyola four years ago based on a hunch that I had, a feeling that I got while I was standing not far from where I'm sitting now, looking out over Lake Michigan. I still feel the same way. I love the way the water seems endless. I love the way it changes colors, from gray to green to the deepest blue. I love the power, the solitude...I love the hours that I get to spend here. I don't think I've spent nearly enough.
Either way.
I've been procrastinating. Spanish test in a few hours and my favorite, Virginia Woolf, next.
(Surprisingly, that wasn't sarcasm.)
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
More rambling and a titch of life analysis
After a sleepless night, I woke ready to face the world. That's a lie. I hit the sleep button for over an hour while I held Cat and tried not to think about my upcoming statistics test.
However, I got the notecard completed and then went and took the test. My tired self wrote "without replacement" and then again, "without replacement" without thinking, so for the first half of the test, I was doing all the without replacement problems incorrectly. After a brief moment of panic, during which I frantically looked down at my notecard, I realized that my powers of observation and innate intelligence are stronger than my fear, and I corrected myself and the problems on the paper.
And so I'm predicting a high B on the test. It is probably the most ironic thing in the world that of all of my classes, I think the only one that I have a solid A in right now is Stats. I love the class. I love the teacher's charismatic style and I love the fact that we have no book. I've gotten all of my homework in and I aced the first test. (It's funny, when I get a low A, I get really annoyed that it's not higher. If only that could work for B and C work that I've been turning in lately.)
I have purchased my cap and gown! Graduation, here I come! (Commencement, rather.)
Post-convention news: I've been thrown into a self-depricating tailspin of terror about the future. I need to remind myself to breathe. I am still a real person who matters, despite the fact that I'm nothing but a soon-to-be-college graduate with no tangible resume to speak of (besides the PR gig, the extensive babysitting, although it's called child care...or actually, maybe even something better on my resume and the DQ. I need to boost volunteer work). That said, I need to focus on daily life rather than the future and on small accomplishments for the time being.
And so, I am going to tackle tomorrow. I'm going to embrace homework and attempt to hear back from the Chicago Public Schools.
I've got a meeting set up for Friday with a social worker for my doomed Social Work class. That actually might be interesting and fun. I'm going to help her cook for Passover.
I've got two stories due on Monday. The CPS is the most horrible group to deal with and I hate them. Also, none of their information is public. Thus, I've been unable to get access to write the stories that I need to write. I've also got a rewrite due. Excellent.
Babysitting a lot this weekend for my newest family. I really enjoy them, actually, so it shouldn't be hard at all. (Also, desperate for cash.)
Tomorrow is always my long day, and I have a Spanish test and homework due. A rewrite of my midterm for Social Work (ugh, APA format is going to kill me as is my professor's miserable and illegible handwriting). Getting my Hemingway paper back. It was only after I had turned it in that I realized I neglected to mention the title of the novel anywhere, however, I did allude to it in both my title and introduction.
Ugh frazzled brains need to neglectful academics. (This is my fault, I am well aware.)
Ah, the weekend. Let's begin the big push toward the end of the semester and end on a high note.
However, I got the notecard completed and then went and took the test. My tired self wrote "without replacement" and then again, "without replacement" without thinking, so for the first half of the test, I was doing all the without replacement problems incorrectly. After a brief moment of panic, during which I frantically looked down at my notecard, I realized that my powers of observation and innate intelligence are stronger than my fear, and I corrected myself and the problems on the paper.
And so I'm predicting a high B on the test. It is probably the most ironic thing in the world that of all of my classes, I think the only one that I have a solid A in right now is Stats. I love the class. I love the teacher's charismatic style and I love the fact that we have no book. I've gotten all of my homework in and I aced the first test. (It's funny, when I get a low A, I get really annoyed that it's not higher. If only that could work for B and C work that I've been turning in lately.)
I have purchased my cap and gown! Graduation, here I come! (Commencement, rather.)
Post-convention news: I've been thrown into a self-depricating tailspin of terror about the future. I need to remind myself to breathe. I am still a real person who matters, despite the fact that I'm nothing but a soon-to-be-college graduate with no tangible resume to speak of (besides the PR gig, the extensive babysitting, although it's called child care...or actually, maybe even something better on my resume and the DQ. I need to boost volunteer work). That said, I need to focus on daily life rather than the future and on small accomplishments for the time being.
And so, I am going to tackle tomorrow. I'm going to embrace homework and attempt to hear back from the Chicago Public Schools.
I've got a meeting set up for Friday with a social worker for my doomed Social Work class. That actually might be interesting and fun. I'm going to help her cook for Passover.
I've got two stories due on Monday. The CPS is the most horrible group to deal with and I hate them. Also, none of their information is public. Thus, I've been unable to get access to write the stories that I need to write. I've also got a rewrite due. Excellent.
Babysitting a lot this weekend for my newest family. I really enjoy them, actually, so it shouldn't be hard at all. (Also, desperate for cash.)
Tomorrow is always my long day, and I have a Spanish test and homework due. A rewrite of my midterm for Social Work (ugh, APA format is going to kill me as is my professor's miserable and illegible handwriting). Getting my Hemingway paper back. It was only after I had turned it in that I realized I neglected to mention the title of the novel anywhere, however, I did allude to it in both my title and introduction.
Ugh frazzled brains need to neglectful academics. (This is my fault, I am well aware.)
Ah, the weekend. Let's begin the big push toward the end of the semester and end on a high note.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Boston, Massachusetts. (Or Why Maddie Needs to Move Here)
I knew nothing of Boston before I came here.
That's a lie. I knew a few things: it was the site of the Boston Tea Party, it's home to Harvard and the Celtics and the people here love their baseball and have the most hilarious accents.
We had a bit of trouble befriending the stewardesses on the flight out. Something about the orange bag not fitting in the overhead compartment and then me dropping my glass bead bracelet. Anyway, we were served complimentary cold coffee. I laughed when I took my first sip, which the flight attendant of course overheard. And then after my first use of an airplane bathroom is a few years, I accidentally opened the door on her.
Great.
We landed just after midnight. The cab ride to the hotel involved tunnels that looked a lot like the Eisenhower tunnel, just a lot longer. We went to a bar called Whiskeys in the Back Bay area and enjoyed ourselves immensely for the hour that the bars were still open.
A friend of mine told me that the men in Boston would be really sweet, and they were. I was asked out on a date by a guy that I met in line at one of the bars that we went to. And by date, he wanted to do dinner and then a walk through Boston Commons (think giant old park). Adorable.
But alas, my trip was not a dating adventure. It was just a pure adventure.
The rain started yesterday morning. Maddie and I were exhausted after a night of late bowling the night before. I love business people. I know this seems strange, but the idea of entering the business world exhilarates me. Perhaps I shall give it a try after graduation. Something about suits. I love men in suits and I love the way I look in a suit. I feel like everyone I met this weekend was an engineer, which fits into my new life plan which involves no actors/artists/white rappers/philosophers as lovers. (If you've ever seen the tv show "Dharma and Greg," you'll understand that I'm Dharma and I'm trying to find my Greg.)
I got to pretend (for a very quick minute) that I worked for Xcel Energy and talk to random people from other utilities and random clients. I also have a new pair of bowling shoes courtesy of Lucky Strike Boston.
We went to see a movie because we realized there was no way were were going to walk around all day in the rain. We saw "She's Out of My League." Don't see it. It's terrible. And then we snuck into "Alice in Wonderland." Better by far. Much better. Tim Burton's gothic elements really put a nice spin on the classic, and they did it out of the original story. We had to get 3D glasses out of the recycle bin. It was hilarious and the perfect way to spend an afternoon.
Madeline and I tried to find trivia. We finally did that yesterday after sneaking onto the concierge's computer at the hotel (because they were trying to charge $7 for 15 minutes of internet) and printing my boarding passes (3 of them, just in case).
Last night, after exploring Harvard and the Cambridge area, we cabbed it to the south side of Boston (not far from our hotel) to do trivia. Best shepherd's pie I've ever eaten, hands down. It was amazing. We got third in trivia (not bad, but we had help from the bartender) and then proceeded to get absolutely ridiculous. At some point during the evening, we ended up having a row with a man about the Patriots. Lessons learned: don't ever call them cheaters on their own turf and don't insult big Bill B.
Also, don't do shots with strange names like "Duck Farts," which were gifted to us by men at the bar.
Boston is surprisingly chivalrous. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, either un-progressive or very old fashioned.
There was cab-hailing in the rain.
There was sleep and Lifetime movies.
This morning, we went to a diner and had mimosas and french toast and then I packed.
My flight was two hours delayed.
On the plane (I flew Southwest....we'll blog about them later), I sat in the aisle and was joined by a man. We started talking. He had two drink coupons. We had whiskey. We spent the entire flight talking. Boston, Catholics, schools, Catholic schools, priests, college, English, punctuation, mathematics, Tarot cards, the Enneagram, bondage, rain, umbrellas, his hatred of flying, Dairy Queen, (you can tell that I talk too much based on subject matter alone), Reuters, Frontier, Alaska, reality tv, hoarders, everything.
He shook my hand and made fun of my eighty pound backpack.
The train ride home was slow due to mechanical malfunctions.
I was so happy to see my beautiful cat. He's been renamed Van the Action Cat. I love him dearly.
And thus begins the final chapter of my last official semester of college.
Oh and did I mention I'm legitimately sick? Like the common cold. Stricken.
I'll draw conclusions and analyze tomorrow. Tired.
That's a lie. I knew a few things: it was the site of the Boston Tea Party, it's home to Harvard and the Celtics and the people here love their baseball and have the most hilarious accents.
We had a bit of trouble befriending the stewardesses on the flight out. Something about the orange bag not fitting in the overhead compartment and then me dropping my glass bead bracelet. Anyway, we were served complimentary cold coffee. I laughed when I took my first sip, which the flight attendant of course overheard. And then after my first use of an airplane bathroom is a few years, I accidentally opened the door on her.
Great.
We landed just after midnight. The cab ride to the hotel involved tunnels that looked a lot like the Eisenhower tunnel, just a lot longer. We went to a bar called Whiskeys in the Back Bay area and enjoyed ourselves immensely for the hour that the bars were still open.
A friend of mine told me that the men in Boston would be really sweet, and they were. I was asked out on a date by a guy that I met in line at one of the bars that we went to. And by date, he wanted to do dinner and then a walk through Boston Commons (think giant old park). Adorable.
But alas, my trip was not a dating adventure. It was just a pure adventure.
The rain started yesterday morning. Maddie and I were exhausted after a night of late bowling the night before. I love business people. I know this seems strange, but the idea of entering the business world exhilarates me. Perhaps I shall give it a try after graduation. Something about suits. I love men in suits and I love the way I look in a suit. I feel like everyone I met this weekend was an engineer, which fits into my new life plan which involves no actors/artists/white rappers/philosophers as lovers. (If you've ever seen the tv show "Dharma and Greg," you'll understand that I'm Dharma and I'm trying to find my Greg.)
I got to pretend (for a very quick minute) that I worked for Xcel Energy and talk to random people from other utilities and random clients. I also have a new pair of bowling shoes courtesy of Lucky Strike Boston.
We went to see a movie because we realized there was no way were were going to walk around all day in the rain. We saw "She's Out of My League." Don't see it. It's terrible. And then we snuck into "Alice in Wonderland." Better by far. Much better. Tim Burton's gothic elements really put a nice spin on the classic, and they did it out of the original story. We had to get 3D glasses out of the recycle bin. It was hilarious and the perfect way to spend an afternoon.
Madeline and I tried to find trivia. We finally did that yesterday after sneaking onto the concierge's computer at the hotel (because they were trying to charge $7 for 15 minutes of internet) and printing my boarding passes (3 of them, just in case).
Last night, after exploring Harvard and the Cambridge area, we cabbed it to the south side of Boston (not far from our hotel) to do trivia. Best shepherd's pie I've ever eaten, hands down. It was amazing. We got third in trivia (not bad, but we had help from the bartender) and then proceeded to get absolutely ridiculous. At some point during the evening, we ended up having a row with a man about the Patriots. Lessons learned: don't ever call them cheaters on their own turf and don't insult big Bill B.
Also, don't do shots with strange names like "Duck Farts," which were gifted to us by men at the bar.
Boston is surprisingly chivalrous. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, either un-progressive or very old fashioned.
There was cab-hailing in the rain.
There was sleep and Lifetime movies.
This morning, we went to a diner and had mimosas and french toast and then I packed.
My flight was two hours delayed.
On the plane (I flew Southwest....we'll blog about them later), I sat in the aisle and was joined by a man. We started talking. He had two drink coupons. We had whiskey. We spent the entire flight talking. Boston, Catholics, schools, Catholic schools, priests, college, English, punctuation, mathematics, Tarot cards, the Enneagram, bondage, rain, umbrellas, his hatred of flying, Dairy Queen, (you can tell that I talk too much based on subject matter alone), Reuters, Frontier, Alaska, reality tv, hoarders, everything.
He shook my hand and made fun of my eighty pound backpack.
The train ride home was slow due to mechanical malfunctions.
I was so happy to see my beautiful cat. He's been renamed Van the Action Cat. I love him dearly.
And thus begins the final chapter of my last official semester of college.
Oh and did I mention I'm legitimately sick? Like the common cold. Stricken.
I'll draw conclusions and analyze tomorrow. Tired.
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